Winterwear everywhere....

 

 老娘我回来了!

I have a whole week of thoughts in my mind now. HOW. 

Choking hazard ahead. 

So a week ago, something bad happened. I received my O level chinese results. When I saw it, I didn't had any emotions, somehow already stunned. So I just muttered to myself, '' I have to retake. '' Slowly and gradually, the feelings just surge up and then that was it. All the memories flooded my mind. Memories of myself learning hanyupinyin when I was 6, learning how to write chinese letters, learning new words from Aunty. Almost everything that I remembered from my chinese tuition came to my mind. I felt like my middle name was utter failure at that moment.

I borrowed daven's hp and called Aunty immediately and told her my horrible results. She just kept comforting me that it's just my composition written out of point, and I'll still have a chance because my oral got a distinction. I felt better. 

But still, I felt so ashamed. I had chinese tuition when I was 6 years old all the way till I'm 14, I gave up chinese for maths. 8 years of chinese tuition gone down the drain because of my results. I let down my tuition teacher, I let down my parents, and I let down myself.

It really felt like the whole world turned grey and I’m standing at the lowest point of the whole wide world. For that few days, I just couldn't put it behind and the result was just stuck somewhere in my heart, I just couldn't make myself to forget about it. Every morning when I wake up, the guilt comes back to haunt me. It was just like a very heavy burden. Seriously, I was really really very the guilty. And all these just sound too emo-licious so I'm gonna stop typing it.

Because I can't be the frog that Miss liem showed us.

  Kick out the weak-self in me, I can’t give up. For my parents, for my tuition teacher, for the guilt that will accompany me till then. 

On that day, dad and mum brought me to Thai village for dinner. I told them my results. The worse thing they have to do is to comfort me and tell me that my results was good enough. I broke out crying again. Then my dad said something ridiculous.

Dad : aiyah 又不是O level 的成绩，不用那么在意.

Me : 这个就是O level 的!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Mum : Aiyo 你爸爸还搞不清楚状况

My dad tried to comfort me this time.

Dad :不错了啦，at least 不是 U grade

Me  U grade 还得了 !? U grade 比F9还惨 leh !!!!!!!! 我拿 U grade 真的要去跳楼了 

Mum : (Laughing all the way)

Dad and mum told me something serious after that, they said this '' 平时不努力，也没有办法的嘛. ''

Dad even told me he wanted to smash my lappy sometimes and then I got pissed and asked him if he wanted me to burn off all his cigarettes. 

Then he diam already. AHAHAHA DADS ARE SO NICE TO BULLY. 爸爸是可以踩在头上的. ^^

........................

Did I really not put in effort? Maybe. :( Was it really because my compo was fucking out of point which resulted to this stupid tragedy or was it other reasons? WTF I PAY $30 FOR THE EXAM YOU DON'T WANT LET ME KNOW WHERE I GONE WRONG.  

Skip on to a random note. Last week when I was walking home, I banged into someone but I didn't apologise cause I was busy looking at the person Hua feng was laughing about. Then suddenly heard @#&^%@^$^@%$, turned around and saw the bangaladeshi scolding me.

'' Bang into people dont know how to say sorry? Open your eyes when you walk lah ! (and some other language that I can't seem to understand..) ''

I was just dazed. That day was the day or the day after I got my results and my mind was still in a over-shock state so I just stared blankly at him and mumbled a sorry then walked away.

Then it came to my mind. '' Wtf why did I not scold back !? I got no eyes to walk. So you have no eyes to dodge also meh? WTF. '' But after all, he was a bangaladeshi, someone who built Singapore, shouldn't bear too much grudges also. :/

Today was a great day. No studying at all. Woke up early to go 2head for breakfast, bought my navy'blue 0.38 for Prelims. Dad drove us to Rail Mall for my dental appointment. When he passed by Orchid park sec, memories flooded my mind again.

4 years ago, my parents drove past the school and I told myself, '' So this will be the school that I will spend my 4 years with no Hui Min and Rabiah..... '' Awesome. Great. I am emogalz_missherfrens@hotmail.com.

Now, when I see my own school, I can picture everything that happened to me in the school. My horrible sec 1 life, my okok sec 2 life, my not-bad sec 3 life, and my lovely sec 4 life. 3 more months and the school will no longer belong to me. It's just like Canberra pri, I go back almost every year, but it's no longer my school anymore. Everything changed ; teachers, decorations, school library, PE shirts, uniforms, canteen food stores. Almost everything changed.

3 months later history will repeat. Only that it's not canberra but orchid park. Yesterday, our whole class changed into PE attires before PE lesson so that we'll have more time for PE. Not sure what the whole class's thinking but yesterday was a precious day for me because I thought it was the last PE lesson of my life. I am emogalz_donwanPElessons2end@hotmail.com now.

Thanks god Mr sim told us that there will still be PE lessons after prelims. Huge relief but I know he know she know WE ALL KNOW, it's gonna end soon.

We played Poison Ball together, surrounding the orchid of our parade square. F to the U to the N. :') I love my small class !

BACK TO RAILMALL.

Spent 2 hours waiting for my turn. Family pictures'time !

 

Some AL shots with mum !

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 The failed pictures acting like a model.

 

mum's 老古董.

 

  

 DAD AND MUM.

 Sibei buaysong.

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Kua simi kua?

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Grumpy faces !

Don't know what Dr lim put on my lower teeth, some stupid spring thingy which is painfullllll. Felt like the first time when I put on braces, couldn't bite anything at all. Dad drove us back to khatib mrt station and offffffffffffffffff to darling Orchard !

Or somerset. Went 313 first to get the free scarfs from Winter Time. ^^ Uniqlo cashmere faster sales leh. Winterwear is everywhere, love the mood of it ! Toastbox for milo dino and managed to swallow a chocolate cake. 

 

Teeth Pain - my face totally spelled it.

 

River island, Pull and bear, Bershka, Topshop, Zara, Stradivarius.

 River island WINS ALL !

Their boots are so cute OMGTOOCUTEALREADYLOR.

There's one that looked exactly like the pink/blue one in maple cash shop, SO CUTE!!! 

Saw a young couple hugging down the escalators, then they started to kiss and I somehow can picture the next moment when they suddenly fall flat on the ground cuz they forget they're on the escalators. Aiyo, kiss @ escalator very romantic meh? zzz.

Then it was night time and we saw someone holding the umbrella above her head. First time see people not afraid of the sun ray but afraid of the moon light. 

Cut short everything*

Went to Far east for dinner at Old Town !

Damn pathetic, only can swallow ipoh hor fun, can't even eat the chicken and prawn FML.  

 

While driving to 2head today, there was a car which kept a close distance to our car so mum sped off and scolded.She started ranting about how ugly the car was and realized the colour was purple and she scolded even more !@#^&$!^$. HAHAHAHA I DON'T LIKE PURPLE TOO ! Thanks to whoever who invented the black-purple stripes-long sleeve thingy LOL.



I WONDER HOW THE ION'S APARTMENTS LOOK LIKE INSIDE........... must be damn beautiful.


I HOPE MY NEXT POST WILL BE AFTER MY O LEVELS. I HOPE ! TELL  ME GOODBYE THEN.